Then comes the shock. You have forgotten the grill. You have nothing to put the sausage in or on. And you can't put it directly on the fire. Bummer!

Now, you could cut a few shoots from the nearest tree to impale the sausage with. This could be fun. Everyone could sit around the fire and grill their own sausage. It could be a real bonding enhancer. But there is a little problem. You are not sure which trees are poisonous. If you use the wrong tree's shoots, you could all end up in hospital.

Fortunately you are a real survivor. And you like to keep up with the daily news. For once the newspaper in the car is good news. Your daily investment in the local journal is going to pay of now. And it is going to save your honour.

You quickly cut the sausage in 20 cm pieces (8 inches). Then you role each piece tightly in a newspaper page. Then each little sausage package is placed in the coals.

Don't be deterred by the family protestations. Neither by their exclamations of horror when you scratch out the badly burned black packages out of the fire five to ten minutes later. Just give them a knowing smile, even though you are a little apprehensive yourself. Be sure, you are gonna impress them this time.

You now take out your trusty penknife and you cut through the layers of the charcoaled newspaper. To your own amazement you will notice that a layer or two nearest to the sausage are in perfect order. And when you get to the sausage you will notice that it is perfectly edible. Very edible indeed. In fact it may be more tasty than the sausages you usually overdo on the open fire.

If you had enough white paper, it would have worked even better. The ink in the newspaper may change the taste of the sausage - and if you do it very often, it may not be good for you. Pure white paper won't give you these problems.